Always outnumbered. Generally overdresssed.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

BUKKAKE!



As you can see from my photograph, the launch of the Creative Circle Annual was spectacular. This is Mark Denton, holding a microphone, rather than a tiny model of himself. He really looks astonishingly like his Beano representation, so much so that it's almost as though he reverse engineered his whole look from the Beano version of himself. An array of industry luminaries were duly crammed into a tiny bar in the Saatchis car park - which, in a chilling sign of the times, contained only one M reg Porsche.

It was very much like the live version of Scamp's comment section - in fact the very first person I met, before I'd even got in the door, was RJHayter. He had to spell his name twice for the bouncer, leaving me in no doubt as to his identity. This isn't just an obscure advertising blogging conceit, it did actually happen. I asked him whether he ever did anything other than commenting on Scamp and Brand Republic and he admitted to being woefully underemployed. I saw Dave Trott's partner who looks like an old tree. And some really incredible beard-hair-sideburn combinations, not generally seen outside religious seminaries. The event was totally male and monochrome and in fact, whenever I'm around lots of advertising creatives, all these awkward men who don't know how to end conversations, I get the same sense that these people are just vicars, but with booze and black-rimmed spectacles. Whenever I reveal this insight to other people they just look at me like I'm weird (it is quite weird having someone you're just trying to pass the time with at an industry event, saying essentially, "you remind me of a vicar") - but 200 years ago, young men of precisely this demographic would have been vicars. It requires a more or less similar skill set, and involves working with the narrative of the major ideology of the time, in those days religion, in these capitalism. In fact I reckon if you could chart the rise of advertising against the decline in religion you'd definitely have a chart of some kind.

Perhaps the conflict isn't one of ideologies, but for the skills base.

As my dear Mother might say, "ok, I won't ever mention it again."

Update: Traffic particularly low today, so I've changed the title of this post from "Schmoozing with the clergy" to "Bukkake!"

7 comments:

PH said...

Am I the only one to feel outraged at being confronted with a sorry tale about some limp-wristed advertising soiree instead of a naughty Japanese lady drenched with seminal fluid?

Gordon Comstock said...

The stats don't care Phil.

If This Is A Blog Then What's Christmas said...

I spotted you straight away from your description of yourself. You're surprisingly close to being eighteen years old. Odd. Up until the Wal mention I thought you were a wizened old ad hack (and I'm not the only one).

Why do you work in advertising when you could have another crack at being a curmudgeonly author? It's hardly as if you're neck-deep in mortgage and school fees.

Gordon Comstock said...

Fear, my dear man, naked, screaming fear.

But I have a feeling more is about to be revealed.

m denton esq said...

Dear Gordon, what a fantastic write up. I particularly liked the tree reference.

Keep up the good work.

Gordon Comstock said...

A privilege to have you here sir.

pauly said...

I'm planning to launching a hair care product called "BUKKAKE".
I plan to source the active ingredient myself.
'Bukkake because your worth it'