Always outnumbered. Generally overdresssed.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Fuck you


I'm sorry but this man has an eating disorder.

Don't get me wrong ladies, GC is buff, but this fellow looks like he lives on rice cakes and sperm.

Feminists love this kind of advertising, because they get to rub their hands together and say, "Well how do you like it?" I don't like it one bit miss, but you'll never get a husband with kind of attitude.

Last year my girlfriend became so enraged with the miserable advertising for The Harley Medical Group's plastic surgery diet ("Here's Sarah without tits - look, she's depressed and friendless. Here's Sarah with plastic funbags stuck on - look, she's happy and people like her for who she is.") that she actually formed a terrorist organisation, mobilising thousands of women on Facebook to stick stickers on poster sites around London. She recieved, for her efforts, a "Cease and Desist" notice from CBS Outdoor as well as coverage on the Today programme and in Campaign. She doesn't even work in advertising. Imagine my delight.

One rather fun pastime I discovered was googling the slogans that she'd written, and then seeing where they'd popped up in the blogosphere - like ripples in a pond. The majority of people were supportive, in fact the only blogger I found who was hostile was this man, who mainly blogs about working out, the state of his six pack, waxing his body hair and his obssessive compulsive disorder. No issues there then. He gets more than 400 readers a day - enough to run advertising on his site, and there is something compelling about his writing. He's an oxymoron, he's frankly in denial. And you could write a dissertation on his Bret Easton Ellis fixation.

If you're just talking about stuff, that's fine, buy more stuff, fill your house with it, build an extension to house the stuff, get a shed, hire space from The Big Yellow Storage company to keep the excess stuff in so you can buy more, just don't, on any account, stop buying stuff.

The other way round it becomes a recurring minus, lose fat, burn it off, strip the fat away until you're just a grinning sinew, don't eat food, eat half a teaspoon full of this powder, inject yourself with steroids, become a human Twiglet, grow white hairs all over your body and shit BBs.

I did. You can.

2 comments:

PH said...

The poor fellow is putting a brave face on it, but he certainly looks a little shell-shocked by his dietary ordeal. I couldn't access that fella's blog btw.

Anonymous said...

my creative director shovels this shit down his throat every fuckin day. and every day he's been here we've not won a single award.